Why Everyone Needs Some Solitude and How to Achieve It

Though humans might be social creatures, we also need time to ourselves. Our brains crave some time to relax.

Interestingly, our society views solitude in a negative light. It’s considered pitiful to be alone on Saturday night. When kids misbehave, they are sent to their rooms alone as punishment. It’s practically blasphemy to go to a movie or a restaurant alone because of the perceived optics.

But choosing to spend time alone is nothing to be embarrassed about. In fact, it’s wise to spend some time alone on a regular basis.

Solitude provides many amazing benefits, such as:

1. Fewer distractions. Spending time alone allows you to focus on yourself or anything else that you wish to reflect on.
   • People are distracting. They make noise, distract you with their movement, make requests, and more.
   • If you need a break from distractions, a little solitude can go a long way.
2. You can be yourself. Others change our behavior. For example:
   • You act differently around your mother than you do around your friends.
   • You act differently in front of your boss than you do around your spouse.
   • You can only truly be yourself 100% when you’re all by yourself.
3. You learn more about yourself. You learn about yourself when you’re alone because you’re free to do whatever you like. You don’t have to worry about what anyone else thinks. You don’t have to accommodate anyone else’s needs or desires.
4. Solitude recharges your batteries. Being alone can be incredibly peaceful and allows you to regain your physical and mental energy. If you’re an introvert, you already know that nothing feels better than getting some time to yourself.

Use these techniques to find time to enjoy all of those benefits that are found in solitude:

1. Consider your options. Most people don’t have a cabin in the woods they can escape to at a moment’s notice. What are your options for being alone? Make a list. Perhaps you could:
   • Take a walk in nature, at the park, or at night in your neighborhood.
   • Turn a spare bedroom into your personal sanctuary.
   • Sit on your deck alone.
   • Rent a hotel room.
   • Take a long drive.
   • Go camping.
   • Sit in your car during your lunch hour.
   • Make a list of all the ways you could get some time to yourself.
2. Plan solitude into your schedule. Make time to be alone. If you wait until you have free time, you might be waiting for a long time. Plan the important things in your life. Start your week with a plan for when you’re going to spend time alone.
3. Explain to the people that matter. You might find that your partner is offended if you go for a walk alone rather than spending that time with them.
   • Explain that it’s better for everyone if you’re able to spend some time by yourself. A good partner will be understanding.
4. Remove the unnecessary obligations from your life. You might have to free up some time in your schedule if you want to enjoy some solitude. Be aggressive in hacking away the unnecessary commitments from your life.
   • Try to spend as many meaningful minutes each day as you can.

Solitude provides benefits that aren’t easily found anywhere else. It will boost your self-awareness, charge your mental batteries, and allow you to be yourself without reserve. You’re also free from distractions and have a greater opportunity to focus on what matters.

Make the time to give yourself the gift of regular solitude. You’ll be glad you did!